I recently located a video of a reading I did earlier this year at the Layover in Oakland for East Bay on the Brain, a quarterly reading series. I read a piece called “Not Quite Dateable.” It’s serious in the beginning, but wait for it. There is humor.
How do I feel about reading my past debauchery out loud? Well, I am not unlike thousands of other writers and musicians who share eviscerating personal details to a very small audience. It’s my story. I can’t pretend my story doesn’t involve some questionable, embarrassing behavior.
My main point in sharing is the whole hinge of being a caring human being. I share because I felt alone when I went through all my antics, and I really want other people who have done similar things to not feel alone.
Every little drop in the bucket helps with these performances. It’s all baby steps forward. And yes, I do worry I will attract some neurotic psychopath who will use all my personal details against me as has happened to me in past life. Truth is, I’ve been seasoned by sociopaths, so I know the ropes now. Since I’m comfortable with my past and I’ll likely not ever work a 9 – 5 again lest I implode or spontaneously combust, I’m not worried future employers will be able to hold my confessions against me. And frankly, I don’t care. I spent a lot of years trying to be this perfect person, and it’s impossible to be a perfect person. I give up!
I am me.
So yes, here’s another personal story I read in public. I plan on many more to come!