It’s my birthday today.
There were a lot of things I wanted to write about this week, but I’ve been keeping my head down and moving ahead one foot at a time. I’ve bumped into a lot of old friends from San Francisco all of a sudden, which is trippy, like they’ve been waiting all this time to just pop back into my life.
I went into the studio this weekend, had a blast, got a song worked on that I didn’t think was going anywhere and now is working well. The song’s called Awkward, and I love the lyrics, but the guitar was too busy. Writing by yourself and then working with other musicians is always a trip, because you often have to par back what you were doing by yourself to fill up the space in order to better let the other instruments complement. Believe it or not, it’s much harder to be sparse in a song than it is to be busy.
Here’s a rough mix of the song:
Another welcome surprise from my husband was a gift of stuffed Domo (you may not know how much I adore this little Domo guy, and you may not want to know, but I do) and a mini 2-watt Fender Greta tube amp, which I’m actually going to exchange for the Vox AC4 4 Watt tube amp I’ve been dying to purchase since I found it at Portland Trading Company in Portland.
I got my tattoo worked on this Sunday, to take my mind off the drama going on. Got a bonus finger tattoo I’m stoked about.
Peripheral stuff, right? But I’m happy if it’s all about me in a fun way right now, because there’s so much heaviness I’m going through right now with the separation emotions and having to find a place to live and figure out how we’re going to work the car situation and basically how to survive in the Bay Area on a part-time and freelance income, which at this point seems to be asking a lot. Even storage spaces are expensive. One day at a time. One day at a time, it will all work out even if it seems like it couldn’t possibly work out. Hell, if I got through benzo withdrawal and gluten allergies I can get through anything in the whole world.
I said I was going to talk about the insanity of the artist mind, and I will…later. For now, Happy Birthday to me. 31 years old. My life feels like it’s already been lived but it’s just beginning. Here’s to the next few years bringing me all I’ve ever hoped and dreamed for in my writing and music. Here’s to hoping I won’t give up, that I’ll give it my all and trust that I can see these things out to their ultimate potential. I don’t know why music and writing are so important to me, or why they’ve brought me back to life, only that I fear ever losing them again so I’m giving them both all I’ve got. Starting tomorrow.